my search to understand the bigger picture

Friday, November 16, 2012


He who fears being conquered is sure of defeat.

- Napoleon Bonaparte

fear is a nasty thing.  it's the whole, "you'll miss 100% of the shots you don't take" mentality.  it seems like such a strange thing, yet it absolutely paralyzes so many, myself included at times.  why is the "fear of failure" so powerful in our society?

for me, the temptation is to think the final outcome of any event/attempt/project/etc is the final report card on me.  it feels so true doesn't it?  note this quote from thomas edison in regards to the lightbulb.

"If I find 10,000 ways something won't work, I haven't failed. I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward"

if only we could get this concept.  failure is not what we think it is.  failure is not trying.  failure is not giving 100%.  failure is not taking the shot.

40 days ago i decided to try to run every day.  honestly, i didn't think i'd last a week.  my only goal was to get back to running on a regular schedule, and to learn to enjoy short runs again.  a consecutive days streak was just the means to an end.  after 14 days i was shocked, and figured it was only a matter of time.  no way i'd make it to 30 days.  and then 30 came and went, and now, after this morning, i'm sitting on 40 consecutive days.  not really sure where i'll end up from here; just gonna take it one day at a time.  tomorrow i've planned to run 10-12 miles with my friend scott.  

i just know i love running short runs again.  i love running period.  but this is just surface level.  i know that whatever i succeed or fail at, that i am loved by my father in heaven.  jesus loves me regardless.  he's already proved his love, and continues to do so every day of my life.  when i understand that, i realize that little things do not count as my final score (judgment).  my final score isn't even from my efforts anyways, Jesus took that test for me.

all that to say, if you are afraid of failure, don't be.  it's not the report card on you as a person.

get back up, dust yourself off, and try again.  

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